Building Stability on My Own Terms: Lauren’s Story
Lauren Kush (left) with Oakland Mayor Barbara Lee and Kristin Hardy, Vice President for SEIU Local 1021’s San Francisco region, at SEIU 1021’s Black History Month celebration, where Lauren joined labor and community leaders recognizing Black leadership and advocacy.
For many people experiencing housing instability, success is not a simple “before and after.” Stability often unfolds slowly, built step by step through opportunity, support, and persistence.
Lauren Kush’s story reflects that reality. As St. Joseph Center celebrates 50 years of impact, we are honored to share her reflections on homelessness and the slow, deliberate work of building stability and meaning on her own terms.
A former St. Joseph Center client and CodeTalk graduate, Lauren was honored at our annual Gala with the H.O.M.E. (Helping Others Move Effectively) Award, recognizing her extraordinary resilience and personal achievement.
Through CodeTalk, St. Joseph Center’s web technology vocational program for women, Lauren gained technical skills and, just as importantly, a new way to imagine her future. I’m grateful to St. Joseph Center for the support that made that possible.
Success Does Not Erase What Came Before
When people hear a “success story,” they often imagine a clear ending. Before and after. Struggle and stability. But housing instability does not work like that.
Being unhoused does not end the moment you land a job, learn a new skill, or connect with resources. It stays with you quietly and persistently, shaping how you move through the world long after circumstances change.
Even years later, it can feel like something you carry with you, whether you want to or not, no matter your title or achievements.
“Housing instability doesn’t disappear just because success shows up.”
When Survival Becomes Your Baseline
When I was living without stable housing, survival shaped everything.
Where do I park tonight? Will I be moved along? Can I rest without being alert?
Those questions were constant, shaping how I slept, how I planned, and how I moved through each day.
That kind of vigilance does not simply turn off once circumstances improve. Even now, safety and stability are not assumptions. They are things I actively notice, protect, and sometimes still worry about losing.
What the Body Remembers
Even after things begin to stabilize, the body remembers.
There is a physical and mental toll people do not talk about enough. Poor sleep. Chronic stress. Tension that lingers long after the immediate danger has passed. Your nervous system learns to stay ready, even when it no longer needs to be.
Success does not automatically teach us how to relax. That, too, is something that has to be learned over time. And too often, society is not equipped with the empathy or understanding needed for what recovery actually looks like.
Learning What Home Actually Means
Over time, it changes how you define “home.” Home stops being just an address or a physical place.
“Home stops being just an address or a physical place. It becomes quiet. A door that locks. A place where nothing bad is about to happen.”
It becomes the ability to focus, to plan beyond tomorrow, and to sit still without fear sitting right beside you. That is something I had to learn.
A Doorway Beyond Survival
Learning to code through St. Joseph Center’s technology training program did not just give me technical skills.
It gave me access to something I had not had in a long time: safety, time, and the ability to imagine a future beyond immediate survival.
“Learning to code didn’t just give me technical skills. It gave me access to safety, time, and possibility.”
It helped me see myself differently, as someone who could build, solve problems, and belong in spaces I once felt shut out of. That shift mattered more than I can easily explain.
CodeTalk is St. Joseph Center’s web technology vocational program offering hands-on training, professional development, and support for low-income, underemployed, and underserved women building pathways into the technology field.
Learn more about CodeTalk and how to apply →
Stability as an Ongoing Practice
I am proud of where I am now, but I do not believe in erasing the past to make the present more comfortable to look at.
Housing instability leaves marks, and acknowledging that does not diminish success. It makes it honest.
Stability is not just a milestone you reach. For many of us, it is something we continue to practice, protect, and slowly learn to trust.
“Stability isn’t just a milestone you reach. For many of us, it’s something we continue to practice, protect, and learn to trust.”
If you are reading this while living with uncertainty around housing, work, or what comes next, know that progress does not have to be linear. It also does not have to happen alone. Support is out there.
And that is okay.
